Watch When an Iranian Writes in English!
This letter was written by an Iranian employee to his American boss:
Dear Mr. Hamilton,
Hello sir, "I am your servant, very very much." I am writing to you because "all the way to the handle of the knife has reached my bone." "My hands grab your skirt", Mr. Hamilton , "Please reach my scream", Mr. Hamilton, "from the hands of this man, Tom". I don't know "what a wet wood I have sold him" that from the very first day he has been "pulling the belt to my lift" , With all kinds of "cat dancing", he has tried to become the "eye and the light" of Mr. Wilson.
He made so much "mouse running" that finally Mr. Wilson "became donkey", and appointed Mr. Tom as his right hand man, and told me to work "under his hand." Mr. Wilson promised me that next year he would make me his right hand man, but "my eye does not drink water", and I knew that all these were "hat play", and he was trying to put a "hat on my head." I "put the seal of silence to my lips" and did not say anything. Since that he was just "putting watermelon under my arms", Knowing that this transfer was only "good for his aunt", I started begging him to forget that I ever came to see him and forget my visit altogether. I said "you saw camel, you did not see camel" but he was not "getting off the devil's donkey." "what headache shall I give you", I am now forced to work in the mail house with bunch of "blind, bald, height and half height" people. "Imagine how much my . . . burns." Nowadays when someone looks at me "left, left," I tell them "We're this!"
Now Mr. Hamilton, "I turn around your head". You are my only hope and my "back and shelter"... "I swear you, to the 14 innocents". Please "do some work for me"...."in the resurrection day" I'll grasp your skirt"... "I have six head bread eaters". I kiss your hand and Leg "
This was a humorous story but can anyone re-write this poor man's plea in good/strong English? Good answers will be entered for a prize. Answer coming soon.
